Tweeteorites

Today’s Leaderboard

The most-favorited tweets of the last 24 hours.

Leaderboard

Just bought lean chicken breasts instead of hot wings for supper because I'm a stupid fucking mature adult.
by (Jason Sweeney), 13 hours, 7 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 53 others

There's a big difference between writing poetry, and just making stories with rhymes. Guess which one I'm good at, limes.
by (Avery Edison), 16 hours, 15 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 40 others

i'm supposed to train the intern to do what i do every day, but i'm not sure how comfortable i am giving him my twitter & facebook passwords
by (melissa ), 16 hours, 48 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 39 others

I carry my sneakers in an NPR tote, inside a 2nd NPR tote that carries my workout gear. What I'm saying is, no one fucks with me at the gym.
by (Scott Simpson), 19 hours, 18 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 38 others

ME: Hey! Rod Begbie forked my gist!
MAD: [stares]
ME: My Quix gist?
MAD: [stares]
ME: Uh…sorry. I swear to God those were all real words.
by (Merlin Mann), 20 hours, 14 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 35 others

I think I speak for everyone when I say billions of things at once in a ton of different languages and none of it makes any sense.
by (Henry Birdseye), 9 hours, 29 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 26 others

Jurassic period: 199.6 - 145.5 million years ago, or October 24, 4004 BC, 12:17 PM - 3:44 PM for Creationists.
by (Fake AP Stylebook), 14 hours, 32 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 25 others

Careful out there, people. This "Prius recall" sounds like a classic CIA hippie roundup.
by (Rex Huppke), 14 hours, 39 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 25 others

Iran's supreme leader says his country will surprise the Western world on Thursday. I'm thinking PajamaGram.
by (Tim Siedell), 8 hours, 1 minute ago.
Favorited by and 20 others

Looking into the logistics of becoming a wise and lovable old black lady.

Possibly, sassy, too.

Waiting to hear back from my HMO.
by (Merlin Mann), 15 hours, 47 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 18 others

Finding out, too late, that my barber is a huge Jane Lynch fan.
by (Scott Simpson), 14 hours, 51 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 17 others

5 Insightful TED Talks on Social Media - http://bit.ly/bMbNDB
by (Pete Cashmore), 12 hours, 1 minute ago.
Favorited by and 16 others

It is important to close all parentheses. We've all been trapped in a Mike Royko aside since 1978.
by (Fake AP Stylebook), 11 hours, 32 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 16 others

If facebook has taught me anything, it's that no layout in the world can make my friends interesting.
by (Michael Pierce), 9 hours, 23 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 12 others

Monday is a man. It always comes too soon.
by (Jeffrey Zeldman), 17 hours, 44 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 9 others

JPG-only heads. Flash-only forms + scrolling. `onClick`-only links.

Maybe I should just click on your designer's face. Really fucking hard.
by (Merlin Mann), 17 hours, 34 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 8 others

It's clear I will die of a snow-shoveling related cardiac event within the next few years, so I just hope it's at the BEGINNING of a winter.
by (Jason), 18 hours, 18 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 8 others

Ever have one of those days you just wanna rent a storage unit, fill it with pepperoni sticks, and just... you know... hang out?
by (Jason Sweeney), 22 hours, 5 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 8 others

It turns out I have my shirt on backwards and I'm wearing two different socks. I apologize for being so flamboyant with my heterosexuality.
by (R.J.), 14 hours, 54 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 7 others

if the GoDaddy SuperBowl commercials made you think you'd like to take your domain registrar business elsewhere http://bit.ly/c1enbO
by (Gina Trapani), 16 hours, 51 minutes ago.
Favorited by and 7 others