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MsNovember

Tweets favorited by MsNovember’s friends.

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"Oh, blow me", said the tissue.
by (notorious d.e.b.), 1 hour, 20 minutes ago.
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I need to write a book just so I can use, "The only thing tight about her were the stalactites growing in her cervix."
by (Aimee B), 1 hour, 25 minutes ago.
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My parents are "dancing". It looks like they're being attacked by bees.
by (Aimee B), 2 hours, 42 minutes ago.
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BP must be in the diaper business, too. These blowout preventers never work.
by (Brian Bolter), 2 hours, 49 minutes ago.
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I explained I was wearing flip flops because of my infected open heel wound, not poor fashion, but people still wouldn't high five me. :(
by (Jason), 3 hours, 1 minute ago.
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 No results found for "Shirley Temple Black Russian"

Until now.
by (matt), 3 hours, 3 minutes ago.
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You still pay for a cell phone? In Bed-Stuy we use courier pigeons instead. If you see me clapping on a rooftop, I'm checking my voicemail.
by (Simon Goetz), 3 hours, 10 minutes ago.
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Just got hit on by a Blackberry user. Gross.
by (Chris Clark), 3 hours, 18 minutes ago.
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In the middle of a discussion about Facebook and gender, she suddenly says "Oh! Butter!" and runs out of the room.
by (Simon Crowley), 3 hours, 28 minutes ago.
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I see you're looking at the Aston Martin. You have fine taste. Perhaps I can interest you in a reheated Big Mac. -Facebook as a Car Salesman
by (luckyshirt), 3 hours, 28 minutes ago.
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♪ Bourbon in my slushie ♪
by (Jason Sweeney), 3 hours, 31 minutes ago.
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Why does Robert Plant get all the chicks? I wear a fringe vest and talk about Tolkien too.
by (Jim Hamilton), 3 hours, 32 minutes ago.
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Me: "Oh god. I wonder what else can go wrong."
Husband: "Hurricane tomorrow."
Me: "Touché."
by (Beth), 3 hours, 37 minutes ago.
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Don't you just hate it when you think you're buying just-below-the-knee leggings and they turn out to be tights? Hipstering ain't easy.
by (Amanda2), 3 hours, 39 minutes ago.
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If they made an 80-ton bag of popcorn, I'd still be surprised when I scraped the bottom halfway through the movie.
by (Katie Rose), 3 hours, 49 minutes ago.
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My toots have been too sexual lately and I'm sorry. Here: Tyler Perry's House of Paynecakes. Not funny, but at least I didn't say boner.
by (Alison Agosti), 3 hours, 49 minutes ago.
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Penis car penis car drives wherever the penises are no I will not shut up I paid to eat in this restaurant goddammit
by (Jay Hathaway), 3 hours, 51 minutes ago.
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There is a definite hierarchy in the hotel minibar and I've gone into the cognac. God help us all.
by (Amy Jane Gruber), 3 hours, 52 minutes ago.
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@seoulbrother @jimray @samhey I'm comin’ to your town JERKS.
by (David Cairns), 4 hours, 9 minutes ago.
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IT'S CRIPPLING INSECURITY AND BUD LIGHT LIME TIME.
by (Sam Hey), 4 hours, 15 minutes ago.
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