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domnit

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No don' wanna get up, wanna sleep. Oh, plane? For SXSW. Okay. Will get up.
by (Abby Spice), 3 hours, 21 minutes ago.
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Everything in the SXSW schedule is named like a Dr. Strangelove sequel.
by (Ben Tesch), 5 hours, 32 minutes ago.
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One is the loneliest number. Seven is kinda racist. Nine needs to just come out already. Four drinks to forget. Three is angry, so so angry.
by (Ryan), 5 hours, 35 minutes ago.
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I wanted twitter to hear it first: I have a boyfriend now. His name is Radio Lab.
by (Jessie Char), 5 hours, 56 minutes ago.
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What do you call it when a guy makes you pick up the check? An unfunded man-date. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAGHcoughcoughcoughcoughcoughcoughco
by (B-Cam), 6 hours, 19 minutes ago.
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Just set my alarm for 6AM. This is going to be hilarious if it actually works.
by (SeoulBrother), 6 hours, 48 minutes ago.
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@scottsimpson It's a rip-off if they don't let you safely fall through the ceiling at some point though.
by (hubs), 7 hours, 8 minutes ago.
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Any office building could open a side business as an action movie theme park just by charging to let you crawl through the ductwork.
by (Scott Simpson), 7 hours, 13 minutes ago.
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@Just_Alison No, I get it. I was just repeating what you said in a dumb voice.
by (David S.), 7 hours, 38 minutes ago.
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@daveshumka So 23 Twibzler jokes. One for every hour you're on Twitter. How are you not getting this?
by (Alison Agosti), 7 hours, 43 minutes ago.
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Jitlada! Now that he's full of fish kidneys I'll sell him on the black market. http://twitpic.com/17uugk
by (Liana Maeby), 8 hours, 2 minutes ago.
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My Mesh Tanktop app would check tomorrow's weather and your appointments and then recommend or not recommend a mesh tanktop.
by (Tim Siedell), 8 hours, 7 minutes ago.
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lol I just thought, "damn, I need to write something, but I don't want people to see it." Like, I forgot you can write on not the Internet.
by (leannet), 8 hours, 33 minutes ago.
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I just saw a six year old Puerto Rican boy who had almost a full mustache.
by (Jodi Faye Bullock), 9 hours, 9 minutes ago.
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If you're very quiet, you can hear the sad trombone after the phrase "Also showing in 2D".
by (Jason Sweeney), 10 hours, 4 minutes ago.
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Being an introvert both describes my personality and my bellybutton.
by (Alison Agosti), 10 hours, 21 minutes ago.
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Snow's starting to melt. Soon I'll have to rake the leaves from last fall and do something with the dead panda. I told the kids he ran away.
by (Joshua Allen), 10 hours, 22 minutes ago.
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Sometimes I think the moon is really the earth in the future and it's there to scare us but we're not scared. We are so stupid.
by (kelly oxford), 10 hours, 53 minutes ago.
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Guys...I may have just found my dream apartment. I mean, my dreams will fit into 250 sq ft, right?
by (Jeff), 11 hours, 16 minutes ago.
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@scottsimpson Now you've just got to TP @lonelysandwich's house after he uninvites you to his Quinceanera. It makes the feud official.
by (Alison Agosti), 11 hours, 17 minutes ago.
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