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doublejack

Tweets favorited by doublejack’s friends.

Leaderboard Friends’ Faves Ego Boost

Why don't we ever hear about a Mrs. Pope?
by (Stretch Bootcut), 44 minutes ago.
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I hate it when Mint.com sends me emails like: 'Exceeded budget for Gas & Fuel.' How about something more positive, like: 'Room for Porn.'
by (Out of Context), 45 minutes ago.
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Fart Dad
by (SandPo), 45 minutes ago.
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Raising my exposed underwire from my cleavage to yell "FREEDOM!" has only resulted in Mel Gibson showing up to call me sugar tits.
by (best girl betty), 49 minutes ago.
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Silver lining: I never would have known how many of my fellow passengers are passionate experts in the art of airline management.
by (Geoff Barnes), 51 minutes ago.
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Important decision tonight: going with red, Shiraz or Pinot Noir? I need the help of my alcohlic...er...I mean Twitter friends.
by (judyschu), 52 minutes ago.
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I was called a player today. I'm still not sure how to take that.
by (Ed C), 52 minutes ago.
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Heard being sung while a broken cup was emptied: "Take…this broken cup…and".

This house is like the worst episode of Glee ever.
by (Arch Stanton), 53 minutes ago.
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@ashamedtosay I am! Thanks. Though I've heard it can take up to 12 hours for food poisoning to take effect when placed in lasagna.
by (Wade), 53 minutes ago.
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@OhHaylYes OH MY GOD IS IT REALLY FRIDAY NOW I CAN'T TELL BECAUSE OF ALL THE RED BULL AND VODKA I'VE BEEN MAINLINING UNDER MY DESK
by (Angry Old Coot), 57 minutes ago.
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@chockenberry OF COURSE YOUD LIKE ROAMIN NUMERALS, THEYRE THE ONLY WAY TO DO MATH IN THE CHOCK LOCK
by (Simon Crowley), 59 minutes ago.
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I remember when WWF meant Superfly Snuka bodyslamming nerds who play scrabble.
[1586]
by (Sam Hey), 1 hour, 5 minutes ago.
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My cock could really go for some tease about now.
by (Larry Carlat), 1 hour, 11 minutes ago.
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Sriracha pho the win!
by (Jay Hathaway), 1 hour, 17 minutes ago.
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Thank you, Zach Galifianakis, for getting famous so that women way out of my league look at me and think, if ever so fleetingly, "maybe."
by (Essex Mortimer Dogg), 1 hour, 17 minutes ago.
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Proof you have too much email? When walking through security you realize you're carrying water and mutter "Shit, I need to delete this!"
by (Chris Messina), 1 hour, 25 minutes ago.
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P22’s release of Edward Johnston’s Underground face is now available in @typekit … Bloody yes, please. http://typekit.com/fonts/1445
by (Grant Hutchinson), 1 hour, 29 minutes ago.
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I wonder if ugly people make a pretty face when they orgasm.
by (Nikolai), 1 hour, 30 minutes ago.
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Damn this sexy robot is sure making me thirsty for vodka
by (extranapkins), 1 hour, 33 minutes ago.
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This underwear has officially met its annoyance level and will be meeting its fate in the garbage in about 10 minutes.
by (Karyn J), 1 hour, 39 minutes ago.
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