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dwineman

Tweets favorited by dwineman’s friends.

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@texburgher I call it Favstar.
by (Brian Bolter), 1 hour, 44 minutes ago.
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The theme is vampires but I'm going as the quivering damsel. This concludes today's episode of Freud 101. Tomorrow: The Cigar Who Loved Me.
by (Melissa), 2 hours ago.
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I want beer. All of the beer in the whole wide world. All of it! ALL OF ITTTTTTT!
by (Sarah), 2 hours, 38 minutes ago.
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Riding a motorcycle to Temple.

Shabbat shalom indeed!
by (D. E. Benson), 2 hours, 46 minutes ago.
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When a product claims to take your experience "to the next level," I just assume they're talking about hell.
by (SeoulBrother), 3 hours, 1 minute ago.
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If only my employer knew I'd be happy about receiving my wages in wine. Don't quote me on that though. I'm just drunk at work.
by (Crackbarbie), 3 hours, 14 minutes ago.
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But seriously, I tuck my pinky under the iPhone when I hold it and the dock hole is sharp.

Class-action lawsuit? http://yfrog.com/2dw4hoj
by (jimk), 3 hours, 15 minutes ago.
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The Chicago Manual of Style is clearly American, but it has an English accent in my head.
by (Chris Clark), 3 hours, 18 minutes ago.
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@gruber no way dude - he's gonna get DENIED all weekend
by (Mike Dixon), 3 hours, 20 minutes ago.
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There is a glass of simple syrup in my fridge. Technically it's for cocktails but I'll probably end up chugging it anyway.
by (Chris Aucutt), 3 hours, 24 minutes ago.
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Yes ma'am. I'll hang my head in shame after I've hung my testicles in this iced coffee.

My dignity takes a back seat when battling the heat
by (Jonathan), 3 hours, 41 minutes ago.
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My cab driver uses his blinkers when changing lanes. Is this real life??
by (Yodel T. Machine), 3 hours, 48 minutes ago.
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I win. Looked in my sister-in-law's liquor cabinet and found a '95 El Tesoro Anejo mostly full.
by (Bill Bumgarner), 3 hours, 50 minutes ago.
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"pencils ... giant pencils ... "
by (Scott Simpson), 3 hours, 53 minutes ago.
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Hmm, repeatedly clicking on various email messages in my inbox is not making them disappear. Well, might as well go home—I tried!
by (Scott Simpson), 3 hours, 55 minutes ago.
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There are grievous branding errors, and then there is Dressbarn.
by (Linda ), 3 hours, 58 minutes ago.
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Oh no I can't believe I missed your call when I declined it because I was playing Bejeweled.
by (Robin McCauley), 3 hours, 59 minutes ago.
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Just watched Toby pug open his crate...from the inside. That dude has always been too smart for his own good.
by (Carrie), 4 hours, 20 minutes ago.
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Apparently this is not a karaoke bar, but a daycare. I've been asked to stop singing and told that I have a right to remain silent.
by (Doctor Zaius), 4 hours, 37 minutes ago.
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In protest of Ellen leaving, I will not watch American Idol. I began this protest 8 years ago.
by (Andy Borowitz), 4 hours, 49 minutes ago.
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