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ohheygreat

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@Just_Alison @daveshumka My God. She's right. Unstar.
by (Polythene Spam), 1 hour, 9 minutes ago.
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White people will never not sing the bum bum bum's in 'Sweet Caroline'.
by (ruthakers), 1 hour, 27 minutes ago.
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After the apocalypse, when we have to survive on cans of cat food, I'll be totally fine. Really. I might add a dash of salt. Mmmm.
by (Neven Mrgan), 2 hours, 25 minutes ago.
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How many roofies do I slip in a pizza, you know ... if the pizza's playing hard to get?
by (Josh Donoghue), 2 hours, 58 minutes ago.
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BP must be in the diaper business, too. These blowout preventers never work.
by (Brian Bolter), 3 hours, 12 minutes ago.
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The Jonas Brothers have lots of moles. I hope they get them checked often.
by (Stacey), 3 hours, 26 minutes ago.
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 No results found for "Shirley Temple Black Russian"

Until now.
by (matt), 3 hours, 27 minutes ago.
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In less than an hour I will attempt to live-tweet a color photograph of the actual Bun E. Carlos. You may begin refreshing... NOW.
by (JTD), 3 hours, 34 minutes ago.
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I see you're looking at the Aston Martin. You have fine taste. Perhaps I can interest you in a reheated Big Mac. -Facebook as a Car Salesman
by (luckyshirt), 3 hours, 52 minutes ago.
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♪ Bourbon in my slushie ♪
by (Jason Sweeney), 3 hours, 55 minutes ago.
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Why does Robert Plant get all the chicks? I wear a fringe vest and talk about Tolkien too.
by (Jim Hamilton), 3 hours, 56 minutes ago.
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My toots have been too sexual lately and I'm sorry. Here: Tyler Perry's House of Paynecakes. Not funny, but at least I didn't say boner.
by (Alison Agosti), 4 hours, 13 minutes ago.
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There is a definite hierarchy in the hotel minibar and I've gone into the cognac. God help us all.
by (Amy Jane Gruber), 4 hours, 15 minutes ago.
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@seoulbrother @jimray @samhey I'm comin’ to your town JERKS.
by (David Cairns), 4 hours, 33 minutes ago.
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IT'S CRIPPLING INSECURITY AND BUD LIGHT LIME TIME.
by (Sam Hey), 4 hours, 38 minutes ago.
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My parents got a new TV in the living room and a new bug zapper out on the porch. I got a Sophie's Choice.
by (Erik Price), 4 hours, 41 minutes ago.
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For America's sake, I sure hope the next world conflict is some kind of televised cake war.
by (Tim Siedell), 4 hours, 49 minutes ago.
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I just saw cow sex and a goat tried to sex me and this is what I call a vacation.
by (ChiNurse), 4 hours, 50 minutes ago.
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@bailey your mother.
by (Shane), 4 hours, 54 minutes ago.
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Frankly, your mom and I are old news. It's your dad I call for real intimacy.
by (Remiel), 4 hours, 59 minutes ago.
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