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pagecrusher

Tweets favorited by pagecrusher’s friends.

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@suchducks it's making me so excited but then my parents opened the windows and there's a skunk outside and it's really gross
by (valerie), 1 hour, 22 minutes ago.
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My parents are "dancing". It looks like they're being attacked by bees.
by (Aimee B), 1 hour, 46 minutes ago.
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I explained I was wearing flip flops because of my infected open heel wound, not poor fashion, but people still wouldn't high five me. :(
by (Jason), 2 hours, 5 minutes ago.
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 No results found for "Shirley Temple Black Russian"

Until now.
by (matt), 2 hours, 7 minutes ago.
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You still pay for a cell phone? In Bed-Stuy we use courier pigeons instead. If you see me clapping on a rooftop, I'm checking my voicemail.
by (Simon Goetz), 2 hours, 14 minutes ago.
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Just got hit on by a Blackberry user. Gross.
by (Chris Clark), 2 hours, 22 minutes ago.
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#Follow me because I'm drunk and I put deodorant on my basset hound's armpits.
by (Jenny), 2 hours, 29 minutes ago.
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In the middle of a discussion about Facebook and gender, she suddenly says "Oh! Butter!" and runs out of the room.
by (Simon Crowley), 2 hours, 32 minutes ago.
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I see you're looking at the Aston Martin. You have fine taste. Perhaps I can interest you in a reheated Big Mac. -Facebook as a Car Salesman
by (luckyshirt), 2 hours, 32 minutes ago.
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♪ Bourbon in my slushie ♪
by (Jason Sweeney), 2 hours, 35 minutes ago.
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Me: "Oh god. I wonder what else can go wrong."
Husband: "Hurricane tomorrow."
Me: "Touché."
by (Beth), 2 hours, 41 minutes ago.
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Don't you just hate it when you think you're buying just-below-the-knee leggings and they turn out to be tights? Hipstering ain't easy.
by (Amanda2), 2 hours, 43 minutes ago.
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If they made an 80-ton bag of popcorn, I'd still be surprised when I scraped the bottom halfway through the movie.
by (Katie Rose), 2 hours, 53 minutes ago.
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Penis car penis car drives wherever the penises are no I will not shut up I paid to eat in this restaurant goddammit
by (Jay Hathaway), 2 hours, 55 minutes ago.
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There is a definite hierarchy in the hotel minibar and I've gone into the cognac. God help us all.
by (Amy Jane Gruber), 2 hours, 56 minutes ago.
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Heading down in the lift, a MUZAK cover of a Nickleback song comes on and I begin to wonder just how low this elevator is going to go.
by (Jonathan), 3 hours, 11 minutes ago.
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Decapitated--and loving it! http://twitpic.com/2kywb3
by (Brian Hosey), 3 hours, 18 minutes ago.
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IT'S CRIPPLING INSECURITY AND BUD LIGHT LIME TIME.
by (Sam Hey), 3 hours, 19 minutes ago.
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My parents got a new TV in the living room and a new bug zapper out on the porch. I got a Sophie's Choice.
by (Erik Price), 3 hours, 22 minutes ago.
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For America's sake, I sure hope the next world conflict is some kind of televised cake war.
by (Tim Siedell), 3 hours, 30 minutes ago.
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