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secretsquirrel

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I hate it when Mint.com sends me emails like: 'Exceeded budget for Gas & Fuel.' How about something more positive, like: 'Room for Porn.'
by (Out of Context), 41 minutes ago.
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Fart Dad
by (SandPo), 41 minutes ago.
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This year it's time to fight fire with fire. Each SXSW tweet will be met with a tweet about sports. And women. And beautiful Flash websites.
by (Brian Bolter), 44 minutes ago.
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Silver lining: I never would have known how many of my fellow passengers are passionate experts in the art of airline management.
by (Geoff Barnes), 47 minutes ago.
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@zeldman It looks like you're trying scribble in books. Want some help? #sxsw
by (Clippy The Paperclip), 48 minutes ago.
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Heard being sung while a broken cup was emptied: "Take…this broken cup…and".

This house is like the worst episode of Glee ever.
by (Arch Stanton), 49 minutes ago.
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@wendyabc No need. They are training themselves: http://groups.google.com/group/viphone
by (James Craig), 51 minutes ago.
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Is anyone training people with disabilities on the accessibility features and apps on smart phones?
by (Wendy Chisholm), 54 minutes ago.
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@chockenberry OF COURSE YOUD LIKE ROAMIN NUMERALS, THEYRE THE ONLY WAY TO DO MATH IN THE CHOCK LOCK
by (Simon Crowley), 56 minutes ago.
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I remember when WWF meant Superfly Snuka bodyslamming nerds who play scrabble.
[1586]
by (Sam Hey), 1 hour, 1 minute ago.
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Remember when you read all the tweets?
by (Nick Douglas), 1 hour, 11 minutes ago.
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Sriracha pho the win!
by (Jay Hathaway), 1 hour, 13 minutes ago.
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Thank you, Zach Galifianakis, for getting famous so that women way out of my league look at me and think, if ever so fleetingly, "maybe."
by (Essex Mortimer Dogg), 1 hour, 14 minutes ago.
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Proof you have too much email? When walking through security you realize you're carrying water and mutter "Shit, I need to delete this!"
by (Chris Messina), 1 hour, 21 minutes ago.
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P22’s release of Edward Johnston’s Underground face is now available in @typekit … Bloody yes, please. http://typekit.com/fonts/1445
by (Grant Hutchinson), 1 hour, 25 minutes ago.
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I wonder if ugly people make a pretty face when they orgasm.
by (Nikolai), 1 hour, 26 minutes ago.
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I am on a bus. There is nothing okay about this except that I am moving from my current location toward another, slightly less shitty one.
by , 1 hour, 44 minutes ago.
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The GOP voted today to completely ban earmarks. Personaly, I wish they'd stay out of my sexual affairs.
by (Mike Something), 1 hour, 45 minutes ago.
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My treadmill is a Weapon of Ass Reduction.
by (Glen), 1 hour, 48 minutes ago.
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John Waters is the Tim Gunn of whatever John Waters does.
by (Emmy), 1 hour, 50 minutes ago.
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