If I were redesigning the bazooka I would make it look like a cat. People would be all, "That's a big, fucking cat," and then POW!
by trelvix (Trelvix),
1 hour, 10 minutes ago.
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@Just_Alison @daveshumka My God. She's right. Unstar.
by BettyLies (Polythene Spam),
1 hour, 22 minutes ago.
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The cat wears my bras better than I do. FML.
by KirstensDesk (Kirsten's Desk),
1 hour, 30 minutes ago.
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This episode of "Golden Girls" actually says Betty White is 55. Man, that hairstyle really fooled me. I thought no younger than 1,000.
by camillececilia (Camille),
1 hour, 32 minutes ago.
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Oregon is the Amazon Prime of states. When a thing says it costs $29.99, check this out - you pay $29.99!
by nevenmrgan (Neven Mrgan),
1 hour, 34 minutes ago.
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The most interesting thing about the Guggenheim is that it was built in only ONE WEEK by pigeons crapping on an old bed spring.
by plemur (Nick Alias Plemur),
1 hour, 36 minutes ago.
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Saved By The Bell was The Monkees 90210.
by daveshumka (David S.),
1 hour, 38 minutes ago.
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Maybe a rave tent filled with shaving cream wasn't the best idea for the Epileptics' fundraiser after all.
by shariv67 (Shari Vanderwerf),
1 hour, 38 minutes ago.
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"A thousand shots of Debbie Harry's poon don't just vanish from the Internet overnight. No. Uh-uh. Somebody had to gone and done something."
by sloganeerist (JTD),
1 hour, 39 minutes ago.
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White people will never not sing the bum bum bum's in 'Sweet Caroline'.
by ruthakers (ruthakers),
1 hour, 40 minutes ago.
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My senses are so good I don't need a divining rod to find beer at the Minnesota State Fair.
by FlyoverJoel (Joel Ingersoll),
1 hour, 43 minutes ago.
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My GPS is kind of a bitch.
by theresa_lauren (Theresa),
1 hour, 44 minutes ago.
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Guy: you know raspberries & blueberries are highest in anti-oxidants?
Me: nods head
Dude: ok, I'm not going to talk to you anymore
by summersumz (~SUMMER~),
1 hour, 49 minutes ago.
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I've said it before and I'll say it again: The "do the dog face" scene in "Bolt" is some of the best character animation I've ever seen.
by jefferyharrell (Jeffery Harrell),
1 hour, 50 minutes ago.
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I'll party like it's whatever goddamn year I want. And get off my lawn.
by debihope (notorious d.e.b.),
1 hour, 51 minutes ago.
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It's sad that we've resorted to naming our hurricanes after dudes in Dixie Chicks' songs.
by aFinnishLine (Finn Kankainen),
1 hour, 54 minutes ago.
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"Oh, blow me", said the tissue.
by debihope (notorious d.e.b.),
1 hour, 56 minutes ago.
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I bet peeping toms see a lot more nose picking than they bargain for.
by yoyoha (Josh Hara),
2 hours ago.
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I need to write a book just so I can use, "The only thing tight about her were the stalactites growing in her cervix."
by Aimee_B_Loved (Aimee B),
2 hours, 1 minute ago.
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Mommy needs a coma
by thefemmenoir (Danielle),
2 hours, 9 minutes ago.
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